


puppet strings

by OohYayChicken



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Abuse, Abusive Relationships, Alcohol, Child Abuse, Child Neglect, Childhood Sexual Abuse, Childhood Trauma, Gaslighting, M/M, Manipulation, Marijuana, Neglect, Pedophilia, Sexual Abuse, Trauma, i suck at tags im still working on them, lowercase intended
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-27
Updated: 2019-07-31
Packaged: 2019-10-17 13:17:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17561135
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OohYayChicken/pseuds/OohYayChicken
Summary: maybe they're both a little ruined, but maybe they can help each other heal and recover.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [parxandrilex](https://archiveofourown.org/users/parxandrilex/gifts).



> shout out to my bestest friend in the whole wide world (parxandrilex!!), his character is alex!! 
> 
> also guys, this story is gonna be pretty dark (check tags--which still need updating) so please please please be careful!! ofc i'll put warnings for each chapter that needs them!!
> 
> title's inspired by micro cuts by muse

tired eyes gaze sleepily at the ceiling, their owner willing them to stay open. his name is tyler, and desperately wants to sleep— _ god,  _ sleep sounds absolutely wonderful right now, and he’s definitely gonna need it. he starts his first day of his senior year tomorrow morning, which he had already kinda been dreading enough as it is—being sleep deprived on top of returning to hell’s gonna be  _ grand. _

 

tyler’s eyes flutter shut—hungry flies and crumbling flesh—his eyes snap open. he’s willing them to stay open. he’s so tired.

 

he shifts his eyes from side to side as he broods about the new school year. fuck, that’s really starting tomorrow, huh? 

 

he lets out a whine as he drags his palms over his face. oh, dear god, he doesn’t wanna go back, he doesn’t, he doesn’t, summer isn’t long enough and this isn’t fair.

 

tyler’s eyes flutter shut—parasites bursting—his eyes snap open again and lets out another pitiful sound. he hates nights like these—nights when his mind shows him scary images when he closes his eyes. he knows that even if he does manage to find sleep tonight, it’ll be riddled with nightmares.

 

_ god _ , the  _ nightmares.  _

 

he shakes his head and wills his mind to go elsewhere, to a safeplace to settle in for a while.  

 

then he feels a presence—gentle and white, safe and soothing. 

 

“lavender,” tyler whispers out into the darkness of his room. she doesn’t say anything, but he can sense her. 

 

his eyes flutter shut—lavender. 

 

✧ 

 

he dreamt of a tired bleach blonde woman sorting through lamb hides at dawn and being afraid he was gonna be skinned next as he was lying across a wooden table, surrounded by more lamb hides.

 

he also dreamt of a catastrophic flood with very high death rates. volunteers and families searched through the waters and debris, many mothers and families mourning and crying out. tyler had stared down at what remained of a young boy as it was announced that all casualties were children.

 

✧

 

tyler has two alarms set in the morning—the first one set to 6:45am to wake him up, then spending the next five minutes brooding and desperately wishing he could roll over and go back to sleep.

 

he uses those five minutes to ponder last night’s nightmares. they weren’t too bad, just very unsettling. 

 

he doesn’t realize just how tired he is until his 6:40 alarm goes off and he’s forcing himself into a sitting position. he groans out and puts his head in his hands, already craving his bed and precious sleep. 

 

tyler trudges into his closet and tugs a random top and pair of jeans from their hangers and groggily changes into them before heading towards the jack and jill bathroom he shares with his brother zack. he faces his reflection and admires his outfit; it’s just a pair of dark skinny jeans and a maroon pullover, but he loves it. he feels cute when he wears it.

 

he makes eye contact with himself through the mirror and offers himself a hesitant smile.

 

“you look…” he starts, trailing off awkwardly as he tilts his head a bit, “cute?”

 

now he just feels silly. 

 

he shakes his head a little and reaches for his tooth brush, starting his routine. he’ll learn to love himself one day.

 

✧

 

tyler and zack wordlessly walk together to their bus stop, both with one earbud in as they listen to their own music. tyler can’t help but wonder what his younger brother’s listening to—he always wonders what music people he cares for likes.

 

their bus is a bit late, but no one complains as they file onto the carpool, the two brothers selecting their seats from last year. they sit in seats next to each other, nothing personal. zack just likes to lean his back against the bus wall and tyler likes to lie across the seat as they both sleep.

 

“going back to  _ hell _ ,” a boy loudly groans out as he climbs onto the bus, normal behavior from him. tyler’s pretty sure his name’s brendon. 

 

“mood,” tyler mumbles to himself as he lies his head on his bookbag, grimacing at the roughness of the fabric. the fabric of his pillow is so smooth and soft—like his bedsheets, his blanket warm and fluffy… 

 

but  _ no,  _ tyler has to go to fucking  _ school  _ with all these punkass bitchass rude ass kids who act like they run shit and get into fights over anything and have sex in the closets and behind the bleachers.

 

but at least alex will be there—alex is definitely worth everything he deals with at school.

 

tyler can’t help but smile at the thought of his best friend. he wonders if they’ll have any classes together this year, or if they’ll have lunch together again. he and alex met junior year at lunch through an old mutual friend after she invited tyler to their table, and he’s been so blessed since then.

 

and school doesn’t seem to upset him anymore as his mind has returned to a safeplace.


	2. Chapter 2

tyler and alex would sit in the library together as they waited for the school bell to ring last year, at the table by the window. it had a great view of the school’s courtyard which seemed more like a garden of sorts. it’s managed by the librarian and a few art teachers that tyler can’t remember the names of—except one, ms proenza, his art teacher from last year. 

  
  


ms proenza’s one of the loveliest teachers he’s had, if not  _ the  _ loveliest. she’s very kind to her students—even the assholes who give her a hard time—and has taken a liking towards tyler, maybe because he’s quiet and “shows great potential,” as she put it. she even let him feed the fish in the koi pond in the garden. 

  
  


tyler smiles a little as he gazes out the window to where he knows the pond is. he wonders how the pond is doing, if the same fish are still there, if there’s maybe any new ones. maybe ms proenza will let him see the pond again today. 

  
  


he flinches a little as he hears a thud across the table from him, but acts like it didn’t happen as he faces the source. he refrains from bouncing in his seat excitedly as he meets eyes with alex, instead letting a wide smile show itself. 

  
  


“alex!” he cheers quietly enough to not disturb other students. 

  
  


said boy returns tyler’s smile, “hey, how are you?”

  
  


“i’m doing okie!” tyler answers, looking out the window again, smile still plastered to his face. “wondering if i’ll get to see the koi pond today. what about you?”

  
  


“that sounds so nice, i hope you can see it!” alex says, and tyler nods excitedly as he meets his eyes again. eye contact is easy with his best friend. “and i’m doing alright!”

  
  


“i’m so glad you’re doing alright! you deserve to be always!” tyler says before reaching for his school bag to retrieve the year’s schedule he printed for himself yesterday. “do you have your schedule?”

  
  


“yeah, i do,” alex confirms, unzipping his own bag to get his schedule out. 

  
  


the two compare their schedules, and tyler decides that this year might be better than last year; they have  _ both _ lunches together rather than just on blue days, and they have two classes together—one being art with ms proenza. 

  
  


“ooh, you’re gonna love ms proenza!” tyler cheers, tapping his fingers against the table as he tried to contain his excitement. “and maybe she’ll let you see the koi pond too!”

  
  


“awe, i can’t wait to meet her and maybe the fish!” alex agrees happily, but then, “oh no, you have mr best fourth period.”

  
  


tyler furrows his brows and tilts his head a little. “mr best?” 

  
  


“i think i mentioned him a few times last year,” alex says sadly. “he was my psychology teacher.”

  
  


_oh._ tyler remembers now.

  
  


“rip,” tyler sighs helplessly, slumping in his seat as he pouts pathetically. he’s dreading his class so badly already—alex  _ hated  _ mr best last year and told tyler about it lots. tyler came to hate him too, and now he’ll get to experience the wrath of the ironically named teacher first hand. 

  
  


“maybe you’ll be able to switch out of that class,” alex suggests. “they should be putting out the forms in a few days.”

  
  


tyler nods as he props his elbow on the table, resting his chin in the palm of his hand as he looks out the window again. 

  
  


✧

  
  


the school bell blares throughout the building, signalling the start of the first day of school. tyler nervously glances around the room, taking in his surroundings. there aren’t many other students in the classroom, and there are several posters about greek and roman mythology hanging on the walls. 

  
  


he doesn’t recognize any of the students in here either. he worries that he’s the only senior in a room full of freshman— _ please  _ tell him he isn’t in a freshman class, or worse—he’s in the  _ wrong  _ class.

  
  


he can already feel the embarrassment welling up as he retrieves his schedule from his book bag. period one, greek and roman mythology with mrs luellen. he lets out a relieved sigh; he’s in the right place. it also doesn’t say anything about being a year one class or anything.

  
  


the announcements end and their teacher moves to stand at the front of the classroom, offering a welcoming smile. tyler can’t help but wonder if she’ll be like this every morning, or if she’s gonna be one of those teachers who seem all nice on the first day and turn out to be awful later on. apparently mr best was like that.

  
  


“good morning, class,” she greets, voice kind but boring. only a few reply, and she only furrows her brows a bit before continuing. “um, welcome to greek and roman mythology.”

  
  


she gives a mini speech about what this class is about, and tyler can’t help but tune it out. he wonders how zack and alex are doing in their classes, wonders if they’re as bored as he is.

  
  


the class collectively lets out a groan—what the fuck did he just miss?

  
  


  
“—get with your partner now, we’ll present next class.”

  
  


oh dear god—he can already feel the dread eating him alive and he wants to escape, and it only gets worse as students get up and pick partners, bringing their seats with them, none approaching him. why would they?

  
  


tyler stares at his lap anxiously as he listens to the commotion. everyone should be with a partner by now— 

  
  


“i guess we’re partners.”

  
  


tyler looks up as someone drags a seat towards his and sits in front of him, accidentally meeting eyes with a girl who looks to him disinterestedly. tyler quickly looks away as he nods.

  
  


“do you even know what we’re doing?”

  
  


his face flushes in embarrassment as he shakes his head. 

  
  


“oh, well, it’s an icebreakers assignment where we write about our partners so we can read it in front of the class next time,” she fills him in, pulling out a couple sheets of paper for the two of them. he tries to thank her but no sound would come out, but she hums as if to say you’re welcome.

  
  


the two of them sit in an awkward silence for a moment.

  
  


“ _ so,  _ i’m lauren,” she breaks the silence. “i’m just gonna half ass this because this assignment is stupid as fuck.”

  
  


and tyler nods awkwardly, hating every moment of this interaction.

  
  


“you can write that my name is lauren,” she starts, watching as tyler grabs a pen and begins writing. “i’m a senior, my favorite color is rose gold, my favorite show is american horror story, my favorite singer is billie eilish, and that should be good because the teacher didn’t give us a rubric or nothing, if she doesn’t like it then too bad.”

  
  


tyler isn’t complaining at all—he goes about his work in the same way, if he even does it at all.

  
  


lauren waits for him to finish writing before speaking again, “okay, so now you tell me these but about yourself.”

  
  


“u-um,” tyler takes in a shaky breath and wills himself to stay calm. “my name is—is, um—“

  
  


“i’m sorry to cut you off but i can’t really hear you,” she says, and tyler flushes again. she gives him her sheet of paper, “you can just write it on my paper since you look uncomfortable to talk.”

  
  


tyler offers a small grateful smile as he takes the paper. 

  
  


_ my name is tyler, i’m a senior, my favorite color is purple, my favorite show is the umbrella academy, and my favorite singer is family reunion. _

  
  


he hands the paper back to lauren, who actually seems interested as she reads it. 

  
  


“my boyfriend loves umbrella academy,” she reveals. “and i’ve never heard of family reunion.”

  
  


“she’s good,” tyler manages to say as she sets her paper on her desk. she seems a bit surprised as he speaks, probably not expecting him to.

  
  


“what kind of music does she do?”

  
  


“um, like,” tyler scratches the back of his head as he tries to come up with a way to describe it, since most people he’s talked to hasn’t heard of her genre. he gives up, “it’s, uh, bedroom pop.”

  
  


“ _ bedroom pop? _ ”

  
  


tyler’s face heats up, “y-yeah.”

  
  


“i’ll look her up,” she tells him, and he only nods in reply. neither of them say anything else, leaving them in a semi-awkward silence.

  
  


it’s up to lauren to break the silence again, “wanna see a picture of my boyfriend?”

  
  


tyler blinks at her. “u-um, okie.”

  
  


she grabs her phone off her desk and shows the boy her lockscreen, and  _ wowie,  _ what a cutie. he has a really nice smile, and tyler finds himself smiling a little.

  
  


“his name is josh,” she tells him as the screen fades to black again. “we’ve been together since freshman year.”

  
  


tyler offers her a smile in response, which she returns briefly before unlocking her phone to show him her home screen. it’s of lauren and josh together. “this is us at ring dance.”

  
  


tyler isn’t really sure what ring dance is, but he nods anyways and smiles again.

  
  


“he’s in english right now,” she says as she brings the phone to herself again. tyler realizes that alex is in english too and can’t help but wonder if they’re in the same class. he can’t wait to get to art today so he can see alex again.

  
  


“do you have a girlfriend?”

  
  


the question catches tyler off guard and he stares at her with wide eyes, but she isn’t even looking at him—her eyes are set on her phone.

  
  


“n-no.”

  
  


“i could put you on with someone,” she tells him, not waiting for a response from the boy before she shows him another picture, this time of a girl. “this is my friend jenna.”

  
  


the girl’s beautiful and he blushes a little at the idea of having a girlfriend as pretty as her. but he doesn’t like being “put on with someone,” as lauren put it. he likes meeting someone and becoming close rather than meeting someone with the intention of maybe dating later.

  
  


“not really, um, looking right now,” tyler uses as an excuse, and lauren shrugs a little before bringing her phone back.

  
  


“she says she isn’t either. she needs a man though,” lauren says, and tyler isn’t sure what she means by that. “i should put you guys on anyways.”

  
  


_ please don’t do that _ , he wants to tell her so badly. he opts to remain silent.

  
  


she retrieves her earbuds and puts them in, and tyler wonders if their teacher would even allow earbuds. he’s just grateful for the silence that envelopes the two as she listens to whatever she’s listening to so he can put his head down and maybe sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alex is my favorite character. ofc its bc he's based on my best friend haha!

tyler’s second period goes by uneventfully. there’s no sort of icebreakers game, thank god, nor is there any work to do. the teacher spent the entire period discussing the class syllabus—she had a whole powerpoint for it and everything. all he could do is try not to fall asleep as he did his best to follow along with the stapled syllabus that had been handed out.

 

his boredom is replaced with excitement as the bell sounds, dismissing students to their third period—which for tyler is ms proenza’s art class with alex!

 

he haphazardly shoves the syllabus into his bag and rushes out of the classroom along with the rest of his peers, quickly heading to where he knows ms proenza’s room is. he has to dodge and weave around idiotic teens that don’t know how to navigate hallways, but he makes his way to his favorite class easily.

 

his eyes immediately scan the room for ms proenza as soon as he enters the room. she’s nowhere to be seen, so he assumes she’s in the garden. he also notices that there are hardly any students present yet, much to his delight—his usual seat is still free, and so are the other three at the table. he sits down and sets his bag onto the seat next to his to be sure that alex will  _ definitely  _ get to sit with him.

 

he shyly watches students enter the classroom, waiting for his best friend to come in. he’s super excited about sharing a class with him! especially one as nice as this one!

 

he’s worried he’ll disappoint his friend, though. he tends to not do the work in art class—can’t bring himself to do it, and it seemed to disappoint his teacher and his tablemates last year. he could tell they wanted the best for him and did their best to help give him ideas, but he just couldn’t do it. he was worried he wouldn’t do it well enough, that it would look bad. 

 

maybe it’ll be better this year. he said that last year too, but maybe this year it’ll be  _ for real _ .

 

then alex enters the classroom, and tyler eagerly moves his bag from the seat next to him and sets it on the floor by his own chair. alex makes his way over when he finds him and sits on the chair tyler saved for him.

 

“heyo, alex!” tyler greets excitedly, “how are your classes so far?”

 

“they’re alright i think!” alex says. “ my second period is pretty chill. how are they for you?”

 

tyler shrugs a little, “kinda uneventful. i had to work with someone, well, kinda interesting, in homeroom.”

 

“who was it?” alex asks curiously, and tyler has to take a brief moment to remember the girl’s name.

 

“her name’s lauren,” he starts when he remembers. “she, like, insists on putting me and her friend on, i guess.”

 

alex’s brows furrow a little, but someone approaches their table before he could respond. both boys look up to them, tyler accidentally meeting eyes with a girl—with jenna, lauren’s friend. tyler ducks his head as he feels a blush heating his face.

 

“oh,” jenna says awkwardly, tyler’s sure it’s because of his reaction to her arrival, and he feels his face heat further from guilt. “i was wondering if it was okay if i sat here..?”

 

“yeah, of course!” alex says, and tyler sees her sit across from him through his peripheral as he retrieves his phone to message alex.

 

_ tyler: agagagaga thats the friend lauren said she was gonna put me on with !! _

 

tyler keeps his head hung as he waits for alex’s reply, opening the message as soon as he receives it.

 

_ alex: ahh really? i think she was in my second period! _

 

then the bell goes off and causes tyler to startle—he tries to act like it never happened, and he looks towards the courtyard door as he hears it being opened to see ms proenza coming in. 

 

“let’s just dive right in so we can get started!” ms proenza says enthusiastically as she heads straight to her desk to retrieve a stack of papers—most likely the syllabus—and begins passing them out. she eventually gets to their table and greets tyler with a happy, “welcome back, tyler!” as she hands him and his tablemates their papers. and it  _ is  _ the syllabus.

 

ms proenza returns to the front of the class to briefly introduce herself and go over the syllabus she’s just handed out, and tyler can’t help but tune it out—he’s already heard it all before anyways. he hopes alex likes ms proenza and this class, and that they’ll both get to go see the koi pond! he really likes the koi pond and wants alex to see it too! alex would absolutely love it!

 

he blinks as a quarter of a sheet of paper is placed in front of him, forcing him back to reality. they must be getting ready for their warm-up, but tyler has no idea what it is.

 

“um—alex?” tyler asks quietly, gaining said boy’s attention. “what’s the warm-up?”

 

“she said to draw our favorite part of our summer vacation,” alex answers, and tyler thanks him before staring dumbly at his paper. he has no idea what to draw.

 

i mean, of course the best part of his summer vacation was hanging out with his best friend, but how does he draw that? he can’t draw people. or places. time to give up!

 

and so tyler puts his head down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you! <3

**Author's Note:**

> follow my fanfiction blog if you wanna :^) oohyaychicken.tumblr.com


End file.
